05 April 2012

Voice Over Voice!

Bald Head

V: I have got only one year to live.
VO: Is it Cancer? Blood clot in the brain?Tumor?
V: Does it really matter how I die ? Why am I still wondering if I locked my car in the parking lot?
VO: Can we get back to the larger issue here?
V: Why did I turn off the sound check while locking? It's an annoying sound.I am sorry.
VO: So, what do you plan to do in the remaining one year?
V : Definitely turn the sound check in car lock remote
VO: Anything apart from Car,Parking lot or that friggin remote?
V: Yes. I want to resign my job.
VO: Fair enough.
V: Borrow a million dollars.
VO: Why just a million? Why not 10 million?
V : Well,I won't get approved.Moreover they might suspect I am going to die without paying.
VO: (hysterical laugh) That would be too ironical....okay..what else?
V: Well, I will probably find out where Sujata is.
VO:The second grade mean girl who broke your front two teeth?
V: Yes..her..I want to tell her I love her..She was my first love.
VO: I thought it was Sister Stella who was your first love
V: Well, Sister Stella was my first elderly love.
VO: Whatever that means..
V: Don't interrupt me. I want to see Rajnikanth.
VO: And do what? Make 5 somersault dive in his house?
V: Watch Sachin Tendulkar bat..
VO: You might wanna put a rush order on that one before he retires...who else ?
V: Hmm..Kiss No.6 from Battlestar Gallactica.
VO: You mean Tricia Helfer ?
V: Very much Trish. She appears near me just like she does it with Baltar.
VO: Maybe thats why you have the tumor.
V: Now you're interrupting my flow again
VO: Alrite..What else before the clock stops?
V: I don't know why am remembering toilet seat in my India home.
VO: Do you wanna pee?
V: Actually i do but you know i can't now..damn..now am thinking about the time my brother hid my underwear forcing me to run naked in the front yard.
VO: Ouch..hope you were not a teenager then.
V: Nope..I was 5 but I still watch over my underwear even in closed toilet.
VO: TMI...move on..before you gross me out.
V: Well, I also want to kiss Kajol.
VO: Where...never mind I asked..who else do you wanna kiss?
V: Maniratnam
VO: Ewww!
V: Dude..I meant i want to see Manirathnam..
VO: Thank you Lord..
V: And ofcourse Rahman.
VO: Why don't you add Shahrukh, Aamir and every other celebrity in India?
V: Nada. I have literally "Thousand places to see before I die".No time.
VO: Hmm.What about doing some good to poor people? Charity?
V: Am gonna die..gone forever and you expect me to do charity ? am sure I will see some of those poor people following me soon..I will take care of them then..assuming they paid for the seat next to me in the bus to hell.
V: Why Hell? Are you sure about not going to Heaven?
VO: Well..I will be too bored in Heaven..moreover after working most of my life as corporate coolie, your body is more suited to live in Hell.
VO: Good point..OMG....you arrived finally!!!

V: Hi..can I have a Cafe mocha latte with non fat milk,no sugar please?
Starbucks Kristina: Sure..thanks for your patience waiting in such a long line..you're the only one who was so quiet and kind.
V: Ohh..no worries..it's the holiday weekend..I understand.
VO: Really....?!! understand my ass..you were so pissed off..you had to make plans for your funeral because of this long wait.
V: Shut up..she is super cute..now I don't want you in my head for the next 5minutes while i enjoy this coffee.
VO: You know am not going anywhere right?
V: Don't I ?
VO: May be when I return, instead of this one year death scenario, lets do the plans after winning mega millions..
V: Out now...

Blankkkkkkk Mind!
Completely in the "moment"!

VO: R u sure ?

1 comment:

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